Teenage Dating

Have you ever wanted to talk to a student about dating but dont know what to say or even how to bring it up? Well let me enlighten you on this fun subject matter.
  
Just bring it up. If you want to talk to a student about dating, dont be afraid or beat around the bush, just bring it up. Students love to talk about dating and share their views. I have never brought up a conversation on this topic where a student was reluctant to talk about it. The trick though is not to get to personal right away. If you get to personal to quick, then the student will feel awkward and the conversation will end real quick. Start out with a question like:

"...When do you think it's ok for a teenager to date?"
"...Do you think dating is good for teenagers, why?"
"...Why do students your age date?"

All these questions will bring up some good conversation and don't feel personal.  

Whats the point? This is the big question that every teenager needs to answer before they start dating. After the subject matter of dating gets brought up, this is the mac daddy question that you need to get to if your conversation is going to move any where. You see, most students date because that is what our culture has told them they need to do. This message is predominately communicated to them through the media, mainly music and movies. But what is strange and confusing is that the message is different for male and female.

• Male Message - You need to find a person you are attracted to, male or female (thank you Glee), and woo them so you can receive social status, physical pleasure, and companionship in return.
• Female Message - You need to find a person you are attracted to, male or female (thank you Ellen) and and strive to please them so that you can receive the social status, emotional companionship, and acceptance, that you desire.

There is a little more to the message than that, but that is the basic nuts and bolts. So because most students believe this message, they have a skewed view of the purpose of dating.

So, what's the point of dating? Most students have no idea. The purpose of "christian dating" is to find that person you want to marry while glorifying God in your relationship.  So if the point of dating is to get married, why then are middle and high schoolers dating? Definitely not because they want to glorify God with their relationship or to get married. So then whats the point? That's a great question to discuss with them.

Is Dating wrong? There are many views on this but I will give you mine. Dating is not wrong if you date for the purpose stated above. If you're "dating" (I dont like that term) for the purpose of glorifying God and finding that person you want to marry, then no it is not wrong. It does become sinful however when you are doing it recreationally for selfish purposes. Most (not all) students in America today date for selfish reasons, I have compiled a list below.

• Want to feel loved
• Want to fit it
• Desire physical pleasure and intimacy
• Want to experience what they see and hear from the media

None of these reasons put God in the spot where he needs to be, #1. And if that is the case then dating has become idolatry and repentance needs to be had. Dating can be a good thing, or a bad thing. It all depends on who is #1 and who you are following individually and as a couple.

I will post more articles on dating since this is such a hot topic and extensive topic at that.